DYSPEPSIA GENERATION

We have seen the future, and it sucks.

Science Teacher Loses 37 Lbs. on McDonald’s Diet

5th January 2014

Read it.

A high school science teacher in Iowa lost 37 pounds and lowered his cholesterol by eating nothing but McDonald’s for three months.

John Cisna told KCCI that his body did not deteriorate like the star from the Super Size Me documentary.

That’s because the star from the Super Size Me documentary was a tendentious asshole who started out with a conclusion and made it happen. Quelle surprise.

Cisna’s “bad cholesterol” actually dropped from 249 to 170, and he said he “embarked on the diet to show how we can eat anything as long as we stick to 2,000 calories per day and stay close to the recommended dietary allowances for nutrients.”

Another big factor in his weight loss was that Cisna “began walking for 45 minutes a day, a factor which no doubt contributed to the results.”

“The point behind this documentary is, ‘Hey, it’s (a) choice. We all have choices. It’s our choices that make us fat not McDonald’s,” he said.

I’m lovin’ it.

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