Hipsters On Food Stamps
27th May 2013
“It’s the economy, stupid!” Thanks guy from 1992, but the economy did not tell you to go to college for something you knew in advance would make you unemployable, especially when that unemployable choice cost exactly the same as the employable choice, i.e. too much. Lesson one at the academia should be the importance of separating vocation from avocation, as character actor Fred Thompson and electrical contractor Benjamin Franklin both understood. When I was six I wanted to be in Playboy. Just because it’s your dream, doesn’t mean you should pursue it.
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Before we blame them for their choice, we should ask why they felt they could make that choice. I’m not trying to start trouble, but let’s choose something I’m familiar with, i.e. women: why would a smart high school junior, 4.0 and AP Everything, think that going to Hampshire College for English Literature was a good idea? Why would her parents allow this madness, other than the fact that they were divorcing? What did she think would happen given that she knew in advance there were no jobs for English majors? Serious answers, please, I’ll offer four I had personal experience with: law school; academia; non-profits; marriage. Don’t roll your eyes at me, young lady: let’s say you are the daughter of a lawyer and you major in English. When you were 17 and you imagined your life at your Dad’s age– not the starving poetess fantasy you wrote about in your spiral notebook, but a glimpse of the bourgeois future you then thought you didn’t want– what kind of a house did you imagine in the “if that happens to me I’ll Anne Sexton myself” scenario? A lawyer’s house or an English major’s house? In other words, the choice to major in English was predicated on information she received from multiple sources like schools and TV– sources I will collectively call the Matrix– that every generation does better than the last, that there was a safety net of sorts, a bailout at the end, that future happiness was inevitable, and so we return to economics: the general name for that safety net is credit. America was the land of the minimum monthly payment. And if this analogy isn’t clear enough for you, let me reverse it: the ability of the economy to offer English as a major required a massive subsidy to make you feel like $20k/yr was the same as free. If you had to pay it up front, you’d either be an engineer or $80k richer. That subsidy is now worthless, not because the money doesn’t exist but because the bailout at the end, e.g the four options I suggested were operational 1977-1999 which guaranteed the payments would be made, won’t help.
Bottom line:
Imagine a large corporate machine mobilized to get you to buy something you don’t need at a tremendously inflated cost, complete with advertising, marketing, and branding that says you’re not hip if you don’t have one, but when you get one you discover it’s of poor quality and obsolete in ten months. That’s a BA.
I suffered from this one through two graduate degrees and ten years of living hand-to-mouth — until I learned better.