DYSPEPSIA GENERATION

We have seen the future, and it sucks.

New Jersey Man Steals Armored S.W.A.T. BearCat and Takes It for a Joyride

26th July 2026

Read it.

At 4:00 AM, while most people were sleeping, Christopher Bruton-Frazier was having the time of his life, driving a $300,000, 4-ton, armored, tactical S.W.A.T. BearCat.

If he was a S.W.A.T. officer that might have made sense, but Frazier was just some guy off the street who was walking by the NJ Transit Emergency Services Unit headquarters parking garage in Newark and saw an opportunity.

Apparently, no one was around to notice him strolling through the facility, opening the door, and driving out.

New Jersey. What can you say?

They then pulled the security footage and ran it through facial recognition software, which pulled up Frazier’s profile. When they showed up at his house, they found the BearCat’s backup camera in his room as well as some stacks of heroin.

Blue State Blues.

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