Today in Trump Derangement Syndrome
28th March 2026
Trump imagines negotiation with Sharpie maker for $5 signature pens (Isaac Arnsdorf/Washington Post) Jesus told stories about laborers in a vineyard and prodigal sons, too, and I’m pretty sure he’d never labored in a vineyard or been a prodigal son. I guess he just imagined them. (Journalist: Someone paid money to write stuff displaying how dumb they are.)
Trump To Put His Signature On US Dollar Bills, Breaking Tradition Since 1861 I’m happy they have nothing more important to write about.
Trump considers renaming Strait of Hormuz after either America or himself — once he evicts Iran (New York Post) Sure, I believe that.
Trump’s signature is coming to U.S. currency — as cash use fades (Kelly Tyko/Axios) Perhaps we can get proglodytes to make burning money fashionable because it has Trump’s name on it.
Will Iran Break Trumpism? (New York Times)
CPAC Host Stunned as Crowd Erupts in Cheers for Trump Impeachment (Marin Scotten/New Republic)
On CPAC’s Main Stage, Fissures in the Party Trump Remade (Kellen Browning/New York Times) The equation of CPAC with the Republican party is merely the latest of instances where Narrative Media journalists demonstrate their utter ignorance of anything outside of the proglodyte bubble.
The war in Iran is driving a generational divide between MAGA men at CPAC (Liz Crampton/Politico) MAGA is the New Nigger.
MAGA’s eruption has so far kept Trump from endorsing in key Senate race (Natalie Allison/Washington Post) MAGA is the New Nigger.
Donald Trump Impeachment: Democrat Warns President’s GOP Support Cracking (Steve Mollman/Newsweek) But that trick never works.
49 States Enact Legislation Banning Immigrants From California (Babylon Bee)
The Epstein class thinks it runs America. Today, No Kings protesters send their response. (Rep. Ro Khanna/MS NOW) The not-very-subtle implication is that Trump is part of “The Epstein Class”, hence the linkage with the explicitly anti-Trump “No Kings” demonstrations.
You can’t hide your lying ICE (Radley Balko/The Watch)
Trump’s conflicting messages sow confusion over the Iran war (Steven Sloan/Associated Press) And probably intentionally so.
Troop deployments test Republicans’ nerves on Capitol Hill (Politico) And Democrat bile ducts.
The Latest Front in Stephen Miller’s Personal War (Jamelle Bouie/New York Times) One of the ugliest symptoms of TDS is the compulsion to destroy not only Trump but anybody who is even vaguely connected to Trump.
Is Iran a Political Problem for Trump? Tell Me How Long the War Lasts. (Nate Cohn/New York Times) Apparently Cohn can’t let it go.