DYSPEPSIA GENERATION

We have seen the future, and it sucks.

Cheryl Cole needs a new husband to match her tattoo

27th February 2010

Read it.

The fact that so many celebrities – and especially footballers – have the emotional attention span of the average teenager ought, you would think, to be taken into account before they let the needles at them.

Without being personally acquainted, we can be sure that now Johnny (Depp) has found contentment with Vanessa (Paradis) he deeply regrets that large Winona (Ryder) Forever on his right bicep.

Oh, the intolerable burdens of modern life…. I seem to recall Angelina Jolie having the same problem when she broke up with Billy Bob Thornton. And I won’t even get into the Tommy Lee/Pamela Anderson story.

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