DYSPEPSIA GENERATION

We have seen the future, and it sucks.

Cow Flatulations & Daffodils

14th July 2023

OffGuardian.

There will come a time when you’re sitting in a smoke-filled place from the out of control wildfires, the chicken balls you had for lunch might be crickets in disguise, the cat and the dog both have bird flu, the mosquito that just bit you probably has Oxitek’s Zika, the water you’re drinking is full of chemicals, nuclear threats from the Ukraine cover the media outlets, artificial intelligence thinks you’re stupid, one egg is worth more than the dollar in your pocket, outside the parades of celebration are really testaments to indignation and random murders compete with random heart attacks for worry of the week, you’ve already used up your allotted 15 minute city day trip and you read about how daffodil extract will save the planet from cow flatulation.

(And the scientists who want to block the sun haven’t checked with the ones who are making solar panels. I don’t think they like each other.)

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