Food: A Definitive Guide
16th December 2009
There are four categories of edible substances:
- Food (anything that once had a face)
- What we get from food (e.g. eggs, milk, butter)
- What food eats (e.g. salad, sushi)
- What we get from what food eats (e.g. spuds, fruits, vegetables)
Note that category 3 was designated by God for herbivores (i.e. ‘prey’) and is not properly part of a human diet. If you see a creature that appears human but is eating salad, it is an impostor. This is why certain entities are designated ‘vegan’, denoting that they came from the star system Vega. Feel at liberty to tell them to go back where they came from if they don’t want to be eaten.
My thanks to Glen Wilkerson for this convenient and elegant conceptual framework.