DYSPEPSIA GENERATION

We have seen the future, and it sucks.

The Speech I’d Like to Hear Donald Trump Give

28th September 2016

It’s a short one.

Wherever I go around this country, there’s a question that everybody asks: Why should I vote for you rather than Hillary Clinton?

Well, I can give you one reason. Over the last thirty years I’ve built a lot of businesses and grown a lot of businesses, and had thousands of people working for me. Not one of those people has ever died because of something I did. Hillary Clinton can’t say that. Not one of those people has ever had his dead naked body paraded around the back alleys of a Third World shithole while the enemies of America celebrated.

Hillary Clinton can’t say that.

Hey, I’ll give you another reason. Over the last thirty years I’ve built a lot of businesses and grown a lot of businesses and created thousands of jobs. Hillary Clinton can’t say that. Since she graduated from Yale Law School, Hillary Clinton has never created one job. Not one.

Oh, she’s spent a lot of money — taxpayer money, your money — she’s great a spending other people’s money. But not creating jobs. Not one.

She’s great at making money for herself and her family and friends. She’s great at making twenty million dollars in two years giving speeches to Wall Street fat cats — you know, the guys she’s always complaining about, the guys she claims aren’t paying enough taxes; and yet they’ve given her twenty million dollars in the last two years for speeches. Maybe they know something you don’t.

But how good is she at making money for you? Are you any better off for having Hillary Clinton in politics for the last thirty years? Beating down bimbo eruptions in the White House? Talking a good fight in the Senate? Selling access to foreigners as Secretary of State? Taking government paychecks — BIG government paychecks — for … what? For what?

Think about what sort of President you want — one who creates jobs, or one who destroys them? One who stands behind his people, or one who doesn’t? One who wants you to make money, or one who wants to make money for herself?

Then vote. I’ll be happy to live with your choice.

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