DYSPEPSIA GENERATION

We have seen the future, and it sucks.

Derwood Hodgegrass Heats Ocean at His Southampton Estate

24th November 2013

Read it.

With his palatial mansion behind him and clouds of steam rising from his body, the wealthy eccentric stood as two large attendants dried him in a plush towel and then wrapped an equally luxurious blanket around his bare shoulders. “In the span of two hours, my machine brought the sea from 47 degrees to a balmy 82,” Hodgegrass announced. “After a few adjustments and a bit of time, I expect all my affluent neighbors to have one of these machines,” he continued, adding, “Nature will no longer dictate how we spend our leisure time.”

I look forward to watching the eco-nazis and global warming control freaks blow a gasket. Pass the popcorn.

One Response to “Derwood Hodgegrass Heats Ocean at His Southampton Estate”

  1. lowly Says:

    Too bad he ain’t real, I kinda, sorta like the fellow.