DYSPEPSIA GENERATION

We have seen the future, and it sucks.

The Pre-K Graduating Class of 2011

22nd June 2011

Read it.

The motif reminded an audience in little peril of forgetting that the occasion solemnized a transition from one phase of life, marked by potty-training and learning to sit criss-cross applesauce for story time, to a period of loftier pursuits: tying your own shoes, sounding out words, being the line leader, and other such stuff as dreams are made on.

How precious.

Cynics, of course, are fond of scoffing at occasions such as these. Graduation ceremonies—for pre-kindergarteners? You cannot be serious!

No. They cannot. Pre-schoolers have not yet learned what a serious place the world can be—which is why they remain, to borrow a phrase from Robert Brustein’s Letters to a Young Actor, “the living embodiment of the audience’s joys and fears.”

Not to mention a bottomless hole for cookies and juice.

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