A Postcard From Portland
27th September 2022
Portland is one of the nation’s most beautiful cities, positioned at the confluence of the Columbia and Willamette rivers. But fading livability hangs over it like a raw gray drizzle. After years of political mayhem and an explosion of drug-related homelessness and crime, the city’s fabled quality of life is plunging. Every taxpayer in the 2.5 million metro area knows it.
Portlandia had its lure and charms, and yesterday’s salons and eateries still look modish. But they’re closed, chairs stacked, thank you for your patronage. Those Patagonia-clad tourists and corporate executives on generous expense accounts won’t be coming back soon. On a warm, cloudless autumn day, the city’s once spotless downtown should be bustling but…and it takes a while for this to click…it’s almost empty.
Almost. Junkies, vagrants, alkies, and crazies shamble everywhere. The dazed and tattered wander into high-end hotels and doormen shoo them out. Keyed-up speed freaks bang on cars trying to park. Uptown in Pioneer Square, two heavily tattooed lesbians with turquoise hair kiss and fondle one another, eyes darting in all directions. It’s urban performance art, understand, not eros. In Portland, zanies run the show, and if you don’t go with the vibe, you are the problem.