The Gerontocracy Goes on a Spending Spree
9th August 2022
Dianne Feinstein, whose friends were already whispering about how there she really was, was found walking back and forth between her private room and common area, which she was required to come to over and over again just to get through the 16-hour ordeal. Chuck Grassley, only a year younger, confessed to taking 10-minute naps and struggling to stay awake, while lamenting how he missed his family. Patrick Leahy, 84 and coming off hip surgery, was lucky. He received more comments about the Batman sticker on his wheelchair than he did questions about why he was even there in the first place. “Pat, I’m glad you’re here,” the comparatively juvenile Tim Kaine (64) remarked. “We shouldn’t have to suffer alone.” That camaraderie in misery was not shared by their friend, Bernie Sanders, 80, who frustrated everyone by dragging out the sad affair with an amendment that would have extended the child tax credit. An impatient Sherrod Brown, 69, was overheard muttering, “C’mon, Bernie.”