DYSPEPSIA GENERATION

We have seen the future, and it sucks.

The Coming War With…um…Canada?

11th January 2022

Read it.

We begin today by heading north, past Vermont, over Winterfell, above the Arctic Circle, beyond the part of the map labeled “monsters be here,” and into Canada. There do we find a writer named John Ibbitson, who recently published a piece for the Toronto Globe and Mail warning that American democracy may not be long for this world. “If the next presidential election reveals the U.S. hurtling toward possible violence and autocracy,” Ibbitson asks, “should Canada try to intervene?”

Before an entire nation of 330 million bursts out laughing, consider that Ibbitson isn’t suggesting Canada militarily intervene on American soil. Still…for us Yanks, that is the image that springs to mind, isn’t it? An invasion of moose cavalry stopping to say saw-rry and ask for directions to the nearest riot is not a contingency this country is prepared to deal with. (Or for the inevitable American response: “And you are?”)

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