DYSPEPSIA GENERATION

We have seen the future, and it sucks.

Billionaire Tech Bros…in Space!

21st June 2021

Read it.

Jeff Bezos has built himself a space rocket and it looks like a giant…well you can judge for yourself. Which raises the question: how to go about reporting on this? Is it AP style, do you think, to say the vessel will penetrate the upper atmosphere provided there aren’t any onboard system cock-ups? We can only hope for Bezos’s sake that the rocket isn’t like a typical Amazon product in that it’s smaller in real life than it appears in the picture.

Bezos himself will be onboard for the scant 11-minute flight (don’t even get me started), which has drawn the expected gallons of contempt and death wishes from Twitter. And right on cue, here come fellow billionaires Richard Branson and Elon Musk to congratulate Bezos, even as they maneuver behind the scenes to get their own rockets up first. This is the space race today, people. Once a competition to the cosmos between the United States and the Soviet Union, it’s now a frat contest between plutocrats to see who can blast their insecurities into sub-orbit first.

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