DYSPEPSIA GENERATION

We have seen the future, and it sucks.

SAT to Be Replaced With DNA Test to Determine How Oppressed You Are

10th April 2020

Babylon Bee.

The new method of college admissions will just figure out how oppressed or privileged you are and assign you an oppression score based on your racial background. Those with lots of marginalized ancestors will receive a high score, while those with evil, privileged ancestors will receive a low score. Prestigious schools such as Ivy League institutions will only consider applicants with an Oppression Score of 1500 or higher. Asian students start the test off with an automatic 500-point deduction, while white students are asked to leave the testing site immediately.

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