Then Again, Maybe I’m a Black Man
24th April 2017
Joe Bob Briggs investigates ancestry.
I’m loving all these Ancestry.com commercials where dim-witted actors say, “I thought I was a Tahitian Eskimo Mexican until I sent in my DNA test kit, and boy was I flummoxed when the results came back! I’m really Croatian with a mix of sub-Saharan! I guess I’ll be turning in my furry hat!”
April 24th, 2017 at 18:31
I was going to name my boat the Flying Dutchman, but I found out through Ancestry.com that I’m not Dutch.
Now I’m stumped; I don’t have enough paint for Flying Portuguese-Lithuanian-Eritrean…
April 25th, 2017 at 21:34
The one where the wife says she thought she married an Italian but it turned out that her husband is “Eastern European” just bothers the crap out of me. She uses the same tone for “Eastern European” that Hitler might have used just before sending forth the panzers. I guess when she gets mad at him she’ll have to refer to him as a dumb Polock or Hunkie, instead of a stupid Wap or dumb Dago. Check out the grin on his face while she’s complaining and you pretty much know this has happened.
Given the state of the world right now, the most disappointing thing you would get from a DNA test is to find that you are human and thus related in some way to all of those idiots running the planet.