DYSPEPSIA GENERATION

We have seen the future, and it sucks.

Two-Thirds of Americans Would [Utilize] Use High-Speed Rail If It [Was] Were Available

8th May 2016

Read it.

Pardon me for correcting the headline. I’m picky like that.

The point is, of course, not whether High Speed Rail ought to be available, but whether it can be made available at an affordable price. All of the available evidence points to the answer being NO.

I would use a Bentley if it were available, but I can’t afford one. The whole foundation of the High Speed Rail movement is the search for some way to implement it without bothering to do any sort of cost-benefit analysis, as if we could just use part of our inexhaustible stash of Unicorn Farts to fund it. (Of course, the people who come up with these projects never have to pay for it themselves, which is why it’s always a government-oriented deal.)

The basic problem with any kind of ‘rail’ is that it goes from where you aren’t to where you don’t want to be, and you’re left to your own devices to cover the initial and final stages. When the alternatives are foot, horse, or boat, rail is a great achievement. When the alternative is a comfortable automobile that will take you from your own front door to the front door of where you’re going, on your own schedule and at your own pace, rail sucks big hairy donkey dicks. The people who Just Love Rail are people who live in high-density cities where one can walk or bike or take a cab to where the rail starts, then walk or bike or take a cab from where the rail ends to where you’re actually going. Fine for them. But these are the people who are so convinced that Their Way Is The Right Way that whatever your preference might be is of no account where it differs from them. I ascribe it to the increasing narcissism permeating our culture (e.g. tattoos and piercings and weird hair styles/colors).

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