DYSPEPSIA GENERATION

We have seen the future, and it sucks.

Archive for March, 2010

How to Make Fresh Pasta

31st March 2010

Read it.

Posted in News You Can Use. | 1 Comment »

Google Envelopes turns Gmail into snail mail, wraps it in precisely routed Maps printout

31st March 2010

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This presumes that postal employees can read a map. We know that they can’t read a clock.

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Habsburg emperor’s great-nephew fights to rule Austria again

31st March 2010

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Dr Ulrich Habsburg-Lothringen is barred from running for Austria’s presidency by his country’s republican constitution, drawn up when the last Habsburg Emperor Charles I was forced to abdicate power in 1918.

Dr Habsburg, who has three children and six grandchildren, is angry that he and his descendants are discriminated against while candidates with a Nazi past, such as Kurt Waldheim, Austria’s president between 1986 and 1992, are not.

Not an unreasonable position.

A member of the environmentalist Green party since 1987, in a province governed for years by the far-right, Dr Habsburg has little in common with his imperial ancestors who once ruled much of Europe.

Oh, boy, just what we need – another blue-blood kook. To hell with him.

Posted in Dystopia Watch | Comments Off on Habsburg emperor’s great-nephew fights to rule Austria again

Embracing the Silence

31st March 2010

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Lately I’ve been having conversations with a friend about the importance of the menial, everyday tasks in our lives, and how they provide wonderful opportunities to let our minds loose to roam, explore, and process.

Doing the dishes.

Running a handpress.

Mowing the lawn.

Driving to work, without listening to the radio or CD player.

Sewing.

Ironing.

Sorting all of the pieces of shrimp out of a plate of shrimp fried rice because you love fried rice but detest shrimp. (U.S.S. John F. Kennedy CVA-67, 1970)

Posted in Think about it. | 4 Comments »

They Know They’re Better Than We Are

31st March 2010

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I don’t think Sean Penn is kooky; I just think he likes Communists.

The stupidity of supposedly smart men can be simply stunning. And that stupidity is not random; it tends to almost always go in the same direction, that of failing to understand the workings of the totalitarian and tyrannical mindset.

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Shocking News: Donations Follow Opinions – Who Knew?

31st March 2010

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The Greenpeace noise machine managed to persuade the Guardian to publish a “shocking” article detailing the amazing fact that donors tend to support groups that advocate points of view with which they generally agree.

I’m shocked, I tell you, shocked.

Posted in Axis of Drivel -- Adventures in Narrative Media | Comments Off on Shocking News: Donations Follow Opinions – Who Knew?

The Skinny on What Makes Fatburger So Good

31st March 2010

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Posted in Is this a great country, or what? | Comments Off on The Skinny on What Makes Fatburger So Good

Our Rare Earth Problem: Why Green Jobs Won’t Be Created Here

31st March 2010

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A perfect demonstration of the economic reality of our non-competitive labor rates can be seen in the decision of BP to shut down a solar-panel manufacturing plant in Frederick, Maryland. The plant was expanded with great fanfare three and a half years ago, and green jobs were the order of the day. BP was to pour $70 million into the expansion, but instead, they’ll be moving their production to—surprise!—China and India. BP will be laying off about 300 people here, and, as they can’t find any buyers for their building, they’ll be tearing it down. The Washington Post (a frequent “green energy” booster) now points out that BP, which once (fatuously) declared its new mission as moving “Beyond Petroleum,” is still “committed” to solar power, just not here. “‘We remain absolutely committed to solar,’ BP chief executive Tony Hayward said in an interview Friday. But he said BP was ‘moving to where we can manufacture cheaply.’”

And for those who doubted the United States would be balked in leading the green-power revolution because of obscure rare earth elements that nobody can pronounce (Dysprosium, anyone? Neodymium? Yttrium?), the evidence is becoming overwhelming that we will indeed be stymied by our lack of supply. As Daniel McGroarty, a principal of the Carmot Strategic Group observes, China is involved in an intentional strategy to ensure that the Chinese, not the United States, will be the ones building the green devices of tomorrow. And it’s not only the obvious devices, like windmills and solar panels. China will be making your compact fluorescent bulbs, your power-saving computer monitor, cell-phone display, fiber-optic cables, automotive components, and much more.

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Democrats blame a vast CEO conspiracy.

31st March 2010

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A White House staffer told the American Spectator that “These are Republican CEOs who are trying to embarrass the President and Democrats in general. Where do you hear about this stuff? The Wall Street Journal editorial page and conservative Web sites. No one else picked up on this but you guys. It’s BS.” (We called the White House for elaboration but got no response.)

Oh, I think that the White House and Democrats are doing a fine job of embarrassing themselves all on their own.

In other words, CEOs who must abide by U.S. accounting laws under pain of SEC sanction, and who warned about such writedowns for months, are merely trying to ruin President Obama’s moment of glory. Sure.

Posted in Axis of Drivel -- Adventures in Narrative Media | Comments Off on Democrats blame a vast CEO conspiracy.

Chocolate Goat’s Milk Ice Cream

31st March 2010

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I am not making this up.

Posted in Is this a great country, or what? | Comments Off on Chocolate Goat’s Milk Ice Cream

Barack Meretrix

31st March 2010

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A historic figure making history, this is emerging as an over-arching theme—if not obsession—in the Obama presidency. In Iowa, a day after signing health care into law, he put himself into competition with history. If history shapes men, “We still have the power to shape history.” But this adds up to one thing: He is likely to be the most liberal president in American history. And, oddly, he may be a more effective liberal precisely because his liberalism is something he uses more than he believes in. As the far left constantly reminds us, he is not really a true believer. Rather liberalism is his ticket to grandiosity and to historical significance.

In terms of the classic dichotomy, Barack is President in order to ‘be’ rather than in order to ‘do’. And YOU are paying for all this narcissism; rather handsomely, too. Aren’t you proud?

Posted in Dystopia Watch | Comments Off on Barack Meretrix

CIA says ACLU-backed plan endangered Gitmo officers

31st March 2010

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The agency’s “tiger team” of security specialists was dispatched as part of an ongoing investigation conducted jointly with the Justice Department into a program backed by the American Civil Liberties Union. The program, called the John Adams Project, has photographed covert CIA interrogators and shown the pictures to some of the five senior al Qaeda terrorists held there in an effort to identify them further.

The team also expressed concerns about the inmates’ access to laptop computers in the past. Some of the inmates who are representing themselves in legal proceedings were granted laptop computers without Internet access. However, the officials fear that future unfavorable court rulings could provide the inmates with the capability of communicating outside the island prison.

Treason doth never prosper; what’s the reason?
Why, if it prosper, none dare call it treason.

Posted in Dystopia Watch | Comments Off on CIA says ACLU-backed plan endangered Gitmo officers

Greenpeace criticizes Apple for carbon footprint of iPad cloud

31st March 2010

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Next: Apple criticizes Greenpeace for being stuck in the sixties, refusing to get with the new millenium.

(I wish.)

Posted in Axis of Drivel -- Adventures in Narrative Media | Comments Off on Greenpeace criticizes Apple for carbon footprint of iPad cloud

Can Maureen Dowd Ever Forgive Paul Krugman?

31st March 2010

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Maureen Dowd, the Times’s op-ed columnist for angry, single, middle-aged, Upper West Side women who talk to their cats, ends her rant against the pope today by stomping her feet and hurling the ultimate zinger at the Vatican’s legal experts:

“Maybe they worked for Enron.”

Paul was just doing his job. ‘Tis the season for reconciliation, Maureen.

Programs! Get your programs here! You can’t tell who’s getting paid off by who without a program!

Posted in Axis of Drivel -- Adventures in Narrative Media | 1 Comment »

An auctioneer has been fined £1,000 and left with a criminal record for trying to sell a chest of drawers containing 100-year-old birds’ eggs.

31st March 2010

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Jim Railton, 57, fell foul of the 1981 Wildlife and Countryside Act by offering the Edwardian cabinet for sale because of what was inside.

The RSPB saw the item – complete with 54 eggs from species including herring gull and guillemot inside – and informed Northumbria Police.

An inquiry was launched and the auctioneer was arrested, questioned and had to give a DNA sample.

His legal saga ended at Alnwick magistrates, where he was fined £1,000, ordered to pay £70 costs and a £15 victim’s surcharge.

  1. Thank God you don’t live in Britain.
  2. Without eternal vigilance, it could happen here. Probably in California.

Posted in Dystopia Watch | Comments Off on An auctioneer has been fined £1,000 and left with a criminal record for trying to sell a chest of drawers containing 100-year-old birds’ eggs.

Drunk man killed by pack of dogs in Australian town

31st March 2010

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Let that be a lesson to us all.

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Judge, He Needed Killin’

31st March 2010

Check it out. Why is this person still alive?

Posted in Dystopia Watch | 1 Comment »

Disney Isn’t What It Used to Be

31st March 2010

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Posted in Dystopia Watch | 1 Comment »

Why I Stay Away From ‘Amusement Parks’

31st March 2010

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Bali: tourist falls to death in crater of active volcano

31st March 2010

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The system works.

Posted in Dystopia Watch | 1 Comment »

Spanish air hostesses pose naked to publicise unpaid wages

31st March 2010

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Very curious. Apparently modern feminism has some odd quirks.

Posted in Dystopia Watch | 1 Comment »

Business Lessons

31st March 2010

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Eet mor chikin.

Posted in Think about it. | Comments Off on Business Lessons

Facts you didn’t know about goldfish

31st March 2010

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Just in case you were wondering. I know I was.

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McDonald’s Customer Crawls Through Drive-Thru for Fish Sandwich

31st March 2010

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Police said the customer crawled out of his car and into the drive thru window to get his fish sandwich, after slapping the McDonald’s employee in the face.

‘Course, this was in New York. (Ohhhhhohhhhhhohhhh….)

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Traditional schools aren’t working. Let’s move learning online.

31st March 2010

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The reality of American education is often quite different. Beige classrooms are filled with note-passers and texters, who casually ignore teachers struggling to make it to the end of the 50-minute period. Smart kids are bored, and slower kids are left behind. Anxiety about standardized tests is high, and scores are consistently low. National surveys find that parents despair over the quality of education in the United States — and they’re right to, as test results confirm again and again.

But just as most Americans disapprove of congressional shenanigans while harboring some affection for their own representative, parents tend to say that their child’s teacher is pretty good. Most people have mixed feelings about their own school days, but our national romance with teachers is deep and long-standing. Which is why the idea of kids staring at computers instead of teachers makes parents and politicians extremely nervous.

Posted in Think about it. | Comments Off on Traditional schools aren’t working. Let’s move learning online.

Here’s What A $100,000 Salary Gets You In 20 Global Cities

31st March 2010

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Cooking Some Bacon – The Machine Gun Method

30th March 2010

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Posted in Is this a great country, or what? | 1 Comment »

Beloved Texas-Based Chain Whataburger Makes a Fine Fast Food Burger

30th March 2010

So there, food snobs.

Posted in Is this a great country, or what? | Comments Off on Beloved Texas-Based Chain Whataburger Makes a Fine Fast Food Burger

In pictures: the World Irish Dancing Championships in Glasgow

30th March 2010

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And explain to me why the World Irish Dancing Championships are being held in … Glasgow?

Posted in Think about it. | Comments Off on In pictures: the World Irish Dancing Championships in Glasgow

‘White strawberry’ that tastes like pineapple to go on sale

30th March 2010

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The pineberry is white and covered in red pips and has the same genetic make-up as the common strawberry but with a flavour and ”extraordinary” smell closer to that of the pineapple, Waitrose said.

The pineberry originated in South America as a wild variety of strawberry but was threatened with extinction until seven years ago when Dutch farmers began growing it commercially, according to the retailer.

This would make a great heraldic charge.

I sense a new liqueur on the horizon.

Posted in News You Can Use. | Comments Off on ‘White strawberry’ that tastes like pineapple to go on sale

Don’t Mess With Texas

30th March 2010

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One of the most ironic aspects of our putative “Age of Obama” is how little impact it has had on the nation’s urban geography. Although the administration remains dominated by boosters from traditional blue state cities–particularly the president’s political base of Chicago–the nation’s metropolitan growth continues to shift mostly toward a handful of Sunbelt red state metropolitan areas.

Funny how that works.

Posted in Is this a great country, or what? | Comments Off on Don’t Mess With Texas

Nero’s Golden Palace ceiling collapses due to rain

30th March 2010

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I hate it when that happens.

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Sistine Chapel

30th March 2010

Virtual tour

WARNING: Lots of data. LOTS of data. For fast connections or Very Patient People only.

But it’s certainly gorgeous.

Posted in News You Can Use. | Comments Off on Sistine Chapel

How I Feel This Morning

30th March 2010

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Just so you know.

Posted in Dystopia Watch | Comments Off on How I Feel This Morning

A chocolate bar a day ‘can cut the risk of heart disease and stroke’

30th March 2010

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Validation! What would we do without scientists?

Posted in News You Can Use. | Comments Off on A chocolate bar a day ‘can cut the risk of heart disease and stroke’

Raw Facts: What Some People Don’t Know About Unpasteurized Milk

30th March 2010

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I used to think that ‘pasteurized’ meant the cow was kept outdoors. Shows how much I know.

Posted in Think about it. | 1 Comment »

Non-Enforcement: A Feature Or A Bug?

30th March 2010

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The individual mandate is one of the most controversial features of Obamacare, so when it came out that the law makes no provision to enforce the mandate, many were nonplussed.

Posted in Think about it. | Comments Off on Non-Enforcement: A Feature Or A Bug?

Judge: Gene Patents Are Invalid

30th March 2010

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Well, duh. The scandal is that it took this long to find a judge with some common sense.

Posted in News You Can Use. | Comments Off on Judge: Gene Patents Are Invalid

The Roman Army Knife: Or how the ingenuity of the Swiss was beaten by 1,800 years

30th March 2010

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Sometimes the old ways are best.

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Liberals and Eugenics

29th March 2010

Jonah Goldberg spanks the New Yorker.

Posted in Think about it. | Comments Off on Liberals and Eugenics

White Men Leaving the Democrat Party

29th March 2010

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My, what a surprise. Aren’t you surprised? I’m sure surprised.

In 2008 it was “Vote for Barack Obama or we’re going to call you a bunch of dirty rotten creepy racists.” In 2010 it’s “Barack Obama is still in trouble so we’re going to call you a bunch of dirty rotten creepy racists.”

These guys aren’t showing racism, progressivism, intelligence or stupidity. They’re just demonstrating a working long-term memory.

Took their own sweet time about it.

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Push to Eat Local Food Is Hampered by Shortage

29th March 2010

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Much like the ethanol fad, the ‘local food’ fad is hampered by ignorance of elementary economics. (Although, in an age where ignorance of elementary physics and mathematics seems to be widespread, I suppose we really can’t complain.)

Posted in Think about it. | Comments Off on Push to Eat Local Food Is Hampered by Shortage

Small shifts in diurnal rhythms are associated with an increase in suicide: The effect of daylight saving

29th March 2010

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Another reason to get rid of this stupid practice. You can tell it’s a government program because it WILL NOT DIE.

Posted in Dystopia Watch | Comments Off on Small shifts in diurnal rhythms are associated with an increase in suicide: The effect of daylight saving

Reviews Pour in for a B&B That Doesn’t Exist

29th March 2010

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‘It must be true! I read it on the internet!’

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Basic surgical procedures ‘denied to thousands’ amid NHS cost cutting

29th March 2010

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The future of Obamacare. Don’t say that you weren’t warned.

Posted in Dystopia Watch | Comments Off on Basic surgical procedures ‘denied to thousands’ amid NHS cost cutting

Kosher-for-Passover Beer

29th March 2010

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Just in case you were wondering. I know I was.

Posted in News You Can Use. | Comments Off on Kosher-for-Passover Beer

Call for universities to show bias to students from lower social backgrounds.

29th March 2010

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Professor Steve Smith, president of Universities UK, believes new research justifies offering places to candidates whose A-level results are up to three grades lower than those from independent or grammar schools.

I can hear guidance counselors all over Britain: ‘Do badly in your exams, Johnny, so you can get into a good university.’

Posted in Dystopia Watch | Comments Off on Call for universities to show bias to students from lower social backgrounds.

Key to sweeter tomatoes uncovered

29th March 2010

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Don’t say we never have useful stuff here.

Posted in News You Can Use. | 1 Comment »

Ten Things About Latin

29th March 2010

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Apparently C J Cherryh used to teach Latin, and has a course available.

Posted in Is this a great country, or what? | Comments Off on Ten Things About Latin

Nazi scandal engulfs Human Rights Watch

28th March 2010

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At the headquarters of Human Rights Watch, more than 30 storeys above the noise and bustle of Manhattan, there is so much high-mindedness hanging in the air you can almost taste it. This is the epicentre of a certain type of socially smart, progressive activism — the kind that persuades Hollywood grandees, power lawyers and liberal financiers to dig deeply into their pockets.

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